Kevin Barrett sings “The Duff and I”

Dr. Kevin Barrett sings “The Duff and I” about Gordon Duff (aka The Wizard) of “Veterans Today”:

“The Duff and I”

MADAME MORRIBLE

(spoken) Oh, Dr. Kevin Barrett:
(sung) Many years I have waited
For a gift like yours to appear
Why, I predict Gordon Duff
Could make you his
Magic grand vizier!
My dear, my dear
I’ll write at once to the Duff
Tell him of you in advance
With a talent like yours, dear
There is a defin-ish chance
If you work as you should
You’ll be making good:

KEVIN BARRETT

 Did that really just happen?
Have I actually understood?
This weird quirk I try
To suppress or hide
Is a talent that could
Help me meet the Duff
If I make good
So I’ll make good:

When I meet the Duff
Once I prove my worth
And then I meet the Duff
What I’ve waited for since: since birth!
And with all his Wizard wisdom
By my looks, he won’t be blinded
Do you think the Duff is dumb?
Or, like Munchkins, so small-minded?
No! He’ll say to me,
“I see who you truly are –
A doctor on whom I can rely!”
And that’s how we’ll begin
The Duff and I:

Once I’m with the Duff
My whole life will change
‘Cause once you’re with the Duff
No one thinks you’re strange!
No father is not proud of you,
No sister acts ashamed
And all of Oz has to love you
When by the Duff you’re acclaimed
And this gift – or this curse –
I have inside
Maybe at last, I’ll know why
When we are hand and hand –
The Duff and I!

And one day, he’ll say to me, “Kevin,
A doctor who is so superior
Shouldn’t a doctor who’s so good inside
Have a matching exterior?
And since folks here to an absurd degree
Seem fixated on your verdigris
Would it be all right by you
If I de-greenify you?”

And though of course
That’s not important to me
“All right, why not?” I’ll reply
Oh, what a pair we’ll be
The Duff and I:
Yes, what a pair we’ll be
The Duff and:

Unlimited
My future is unlimited
And I’ve just had a vision
Almost like a prophecy
I know – it sounds truly crazy
And true, the vision’s hazy
But I swear, someday there’ll be
A celebration throughout Oz
That’s all to do with me!

And I’ll stand there with the Duff
Feeling things I’ve never felt
And though I’d never show it
I’ll be so happy, I could melt!
And so it will be
For the rest of my life
And I’ll want nothing else
Till I die
Held in such high esteem
When people see me, they will scream
For half of Oz’s fav’rite team:
The Duff
And I!

***************

Video Idina Menzel sings “The Wizard and I”:

 

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One thought on “Kevin Barrett sings “The Duff and I”

  1. Pingback: Kevin Barrett telepathically communicates with Jim Fetzer | Truther Musical

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