Something is terribly wrong with our transport –
Which we all must now abort,
Until the problem is sought,
I only hope we make it to port,
So never mind taking everyone to court,
I should just forget about my holiday resort,
And my planned trip to a fort,
Because the ship’s captain just can’t be taught.
I won’t be travelling on a Malaysian plane,
I don’t want it to disappear again,
Nor do I wish to experience any more pain,
That sort of transport is just insane!
And don’t think ships can’t also disappear,
They do so very often I hear,
Especially somewhere near South Korea,
Just because the captain forgets to steer,
Now everyone must live with death and fear,
It’s like the crew are all drunk on beer,
Saying a meek “sorry” with a single tear,
And, “Oh gosh, are you ok dear?” –
No, I bloody well am not!
‘cause your training you completely forgot,
It’s like you now think with the brains of a tot,
For so many bodies to disappear and rot,
Why do they even bother to train you lot?
When a better job can be done by a stupid robot,
Perhaps you just want to go to hell where it’s nice and hot!
I best not moan if I wish to go to heaven,
I’ll just not travel on days with the number eleven,
Or with anything that says “Seven, Seven, Seven.”
I won’t even travel with other women or men,
Or in a group that is more than ten,
Or with any animal like a hen,
Or without my lucky charm pen,
I’ll only travel now when God knows when.